THE HANDSTAND

JANUARY 2006

Not only did his current speech professor teach at Harvard for many years but one of his prize students was THE JFK whom he taught to correctly say all his words but somehow the future president had adopted his mannerism of using his index finger placing on the head of every word he wanted to emphasize and in every class Professor Mundane would use the gesture forty or fifty times while lifting his right eyebrow to make sure all his speech class realized the connection One to the Other. Then he would add from down deep in stomach : " The complete obstruction of the breath passage in the articulation of the speech sound b is to also bring the opposing surface of the teeth of the two jaws into contact ...."

For his finals Johnny would read Faulkner's Nobel Prize speech and not only did he believe all the thoughts rendered by the writer who watched for dollars to come his way but he made sure he kept his two jaws in proper contact.

Johnny was given a b for the course and along with two A's in sociology courses, he was able to finally matriculate after seven years of attending - thinking he might become the school's handymen while trying to secure a degree after fifty or so years!

The school many people called "The Poor Man's HAAAAAvvvaaaaaaaaaaaaaad" was situated in a ghetto by a polluted river that was once a beautiful highway of deep waters. END 12-19-05